It's time to wake up, Crossing Church!

It's time to wake up, Crossing Church!  You are being manipulated, used and even extorted by the leadership of The Crossing Church of Elk River, Minnesota; most specifically Eric and Kelly Dykstra.  Your time, your resources, and of course your money, are being bled dry by this church.  

Ask yourself these questions and see what answers you come up with (Be honest!  Jesus is watching!):
How many hours of your time is spent in service to The Crossing Church?  This includes inviting people to church, calling people and doing all their marketing for them.

How much money are you giving to The Crossing Church?  How much is above the required Old Testament mandate of giving "10% of your fields".  Give Eric a bail of hay next time you see him and enjoy that reaction!

How many emails, calls and verbal reprimands are you treated to in a week?  How many forms do you need to fill out for their approval?  What are the repercussions of not doing these things?

Jesus said in Matthew 11:28-30 - 28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Does anything about your current experience feel "light"? I know you are tired.  Exhausted in fact.  But you have been so completely brainwashed that the church, The Crossing Church, is the only hope for the world and you feel everyone's fate rides on your shoulders.

You always want to do something amazing, right?  This is another part that lures you in.  "We have a vision from God!  We're going to be a church of 20,000!"  Or is it 10,000?  I heard God's been changing the numbers recently.  Check with Eric, as God's only speaking to him.

Compare your life to Eric & Kelly's:
Are you frequently traveling and vacationing?
Dining out at fine restaurants?

Living large?  (They sure are!)
You may be angry at me for saying it, or not agree with my methods, but am I wrong?  Come on; am I wrong!?!

You do not have to stay there.  God is not going to punish you for leaving.  Are you scared?  (Most are when they leave The Crossing Church)  I'd be happy to talk to you and will keep it fully anonymous.  TFTBA@mail.com  It's YOUR life!  Eric & Kelly Dykstra have not been placed in authority over you by God...YOU gave them that authority and you can take it away.

Get out.  Be free.  It's a much happier place to be.  

The Crossing Church wants your money right away!

The Crossing Church of Elk River, Minnesota wants your money.  $ Money $ Money $ Money $  But they don't simply want you to ask you for your hard earned cash after the sermon because there is a possibility you may leave before their 5 minute (10 minute, upwards of 15 minutes!) tithing speech.  So now you'll notice they do the push for money during worship time; "as part of the worship experience".

You understand this is all cleverly orchestrated to manipulate you, right?  This isn't God speaking on their behalf.  You have a Section Leader (oh yes, we'll be talking about the 'Sections' very soon) who has been given a script on what to say to you, which ties into the tithe talk and sermon.  Have you noticed the forced clapping as they do the offering?  Again, this is more subtle manipulation for you to give a conditioned response (giving them money) when you make this motion each time.

Eric and Kelly Dykstra are using you!  Wake up!

Money and The Crossing Church

This will be short and to the point; I see my views are way up, as well as views on blog posts linked to mine, and most specifically the posts about money.  So what's up Crossing Church people?  Eric & Kelly laying the manipulation on thick to tithe more?  This would be typical timing as they'll want more money before a kick off event around back to school.
Now as always I do have to point out that the Dykstra's are never lacking in funds for their own vacations and spending.  Tell me Crossing Church givers: how many trips have you taken this year?  Are you giving way over 10% of your income, struggling to make ends meet, and curious as to why the Dykstra's continue to live large on your dime?  Good questions.

If you would like to contact me please email to: TFTBA@mail.com

You may keep all anonymity and I will never disclose anything you tell me not to say.  I've run this blog for 6 years to help people leave the manipulation of The Crossing Church.  I'm here to help.

A few pics of Eric & Kelly living high off the hog....using your tithe money.  All for Jesus!  Right?

Here is why The Crossing Church (Free Grace United) has been called a Cult

In The Crossing Church's latest series "Havin' Church", Eric Dykstra gave a sermon called "What's the difference between a Church and a Cult?"  Do tell!  I listened with great anticipation to find that cults were never spoken of in this sermon.  Curious.  There are many ways to speak on a number of points that came up from this sermon, but right now I only want to talk about why they didn't actually talk about cults, and more specifically why The Crossing Church has been called a cult.

The sermon tried to explain what a "healthy" church looks like, and by comparison, how The Crossing Church is supposedly healthy.  (It's not.)  Eric Dykstra says that a healthy church is not label focused, not person focused and not system focused.  This from the person that put his and his wife's faces on a billboard.  This from the person that tries to brand everything with the Crossing logo. This from the church that has a fully system focused Code!  

I broke this down in my post "I'm Offended" as to why people called The Crossing Church a Cult.  I'll list the reasons again:

• A mother was trying to save her son after your reckless comments and authority trip caused him to leave his family, get married hastily and leave college.  Here is her story: One Mother's Journey 
• You were kicking people out of your church, ruining lives and acting like a cult.  Another story: Open Letter to Eric Dykstra
• You were so focused on church growth and yourselves that people were treated like they were disposable. Another story:Keeping the Faith
• You were forcing submission, insane amounts of tithing and promoting fear.  WCCO news report: Community in Elk River Discusses Controversial Church
• You wouldn't take accountability for anything.  WCCO news report: Pastor Addresses Controversy
• You were allowing abusive leadership to lie and hurt others. My Story 

Here are typical signs of possibly being in a cult (see below).  It's fair to note that some of these signs can be present, and maybe the organization isn't necessarily a cult, but it's still controlling and dangerous.

• •Absolute authoritarianism without meaningful accountability.

The Dykstra's have no accountability.  They bring other mega church leaders on as board members, and these leaders have a thirst for fame just as the Dykstra's, so there is no one to monitor the situation and keep things safe.

No tolerance for questions or critical inquiry.

No one is allowed to question.

No meaningful financial disclosure regarding budget or expenses, such as an independently audited financial statement.

• Ask for a statement of the church's finances.  Ask to know the Dykstra's salaries.  You'll get nothing.

There is no legitimate reason to leave, former followers are always wrong in leaving, negative or even evil.

• People that leave are outcasts.

Former members often relate the same stories of abuse and reflect a similar pattern of grievances.

• See blog posts in list above.

There are records, books, news articles, or broadcast reports that document the abuses of the group/leader.

• WCCO news did multiple reports on the abuses of The Crossing.

• The group/leader is always right.

• Read The Code.  Eric Dykstra is felt to have a Vision from God!

 The Crossing Church members are expected to orbit their lives around that church, they are expected to tithe (big!) and serve to exhaustion.  No, The Crossing it's Jonestown about to drink the Kool Aid (yet), but it has domineering leadership, manipulative tactics and unhealthy behaviors.

As Eric Dykstra loves to say, "Run, Forest, Run!!"

The Crossing Profits Big from Pastor Kelly's Twirl Event

Yes, it's Twirl time again.  Dress up, dance around, worship Kelly Dykstra, get a token gift and some far NW Minneapolis suburb entertainment.  Apparently some chicks dig this and that's fine.  Yeah, I'm lying, as I'm judging the hell out of this, but still - go do you.

I've written previously about where I take issue with Twirl; Twirl is primarily to glorify Kelly Dykstra. The upcoming Twirl event is no different as the special guests are Kelly's mother and her sisters.  All expenses paid by Crossing tithes?  Possibly.  I suppose it could also be paid by the Twirl event fee, which has jumped in 6 years from $5 to $12 (or a whopping $20 at the door).  Kelly's recent Instagram post says thousands are coming.  

Lets stick with a flat 1,000 coming and assume they each pay $12 each, though there are also sponsorship packages of $150, and of course the $20 at the door people who get penalized for not buying early enough (Always only about Jesus!)  $12,000 made in one night.  Also charging $1 per child for childcare (previously they had the men volunteer to take care of the kids).  We'll go with 1/4 of the women needing childcare, and I'm sure I'm estimating low, so that's $250.  Everyone working there is volunteering so there are no expenses for labor.  It's their space so no cost to utilize the facilities.  Throw together some trinkets, printing costs and a bite to eat at about $5 a head (bulk rate).  They clear $7,000 for this one event.

Where does this money go?  Well the hashtag for the Twirl events has recently been "Fight for a Girl".  So is the money going to a charity?  It's implied that it goes to something but they never say this directly.  There will be a Twirl store to buy things and they do say the money from that will go somewhere.  I'm curious.  I know the Crossing doesn't do anything they don't benefit from so I suspect this is more about money and Kelly's ego than actually helping any "girls" in a practical way.

Christmas Dreams at The Crossing Church

I just listened to "Christmas Dreams", weeks 1 & 2, by The Crossing Church, and I was reminded of my last Christmas there back in December of 2010. As I walked into the auditorium I noticed I'd lost the diamond to my wedding ring. I scrambled looking under chairs but couldn't find it. We were being told to move along to get others in, and clearly my issue was of no concern. I held back tears, and stuffed down emotions, because I felt bad that I was concerned over a material possession when I was supposed to be worried about people going to hell. That moment felt ominous. It was like I knew the end was coming in some way. The next year I went all in; money, serving, begging and pleading for God's will. By June of 2011 everything exploded, I saw them for who they really were, and I left.

Some key points from week 1:

• Mary had a willing hear to do the hard stuff.  “Do you?”

• Your story will never be included if you’re not willing to do ‘whatever’.

• Why would God even bother to talk, if he already knows you’re not willing to listen?

• In what area of your life has your heart become unwilling? 

• He will shine favor in the darkest places of your life but you must be willing…

• He searches every thought and understands every thought we have.

• The reason why you lost the joy of your salvation is because it’s not tied to a willing spirit.

• (fake tears around 35:30)

Bottom line: IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!!

At they end they had everyone take a Christmas dreams card from the back of chair.  You were to admit how you haven't been willing in some way to do all God wants.  (Assumption that you aren't giving your all.  This is always the fall back at church when your life isn't thriving...you're doing something wrong."  You were to write “I have had an unwilling heart about_______” and get up out of your seat, and set the paper on the stage up front.”  (Churches love making you make a public display of yourself.  They call it accountability and not the public shaming that it really is.)

Some key points from week 2:

• A god given dream is about advancing Jesus, not advancing self

   “It’s our role on planet earth to make Jesus look good!”
• God put you on earth to advance him
• every time an interruption happens, it’s an inconvenience or an introduction to something better (really?  Every time, huh?)
• "so I pray they get a job, and after they get the job we don't see them anymore, the job wasn't a dream, it was a temptation!" 
• "can you please give me a raise so I can tithe less"  
• power couple for Jesus (Eric & Kelly Dykstra)
• willing heart to do all the hard stuff God asks us to do

So this sermon went on incessantly about not having your own dreams but only God's dreams.  Yet...the Dykstra's are sure thriving and living their dreams! Travel!  Luxury shoes! (Yes, the infamous Louboutins make another appearance.) Vacations!  It's interesting that though they preach on God providing increase; we're only seeing the Dykstra's increasing.  Are their staff buying new homes?  New cars?  Taking long international vacations?  

I found both sermons to be total bullshit and another way to manipulate people to give to them.  "Do _____ and God will _____."  No, he won't.  I was obedient. I did tithe.  I did give.  I did serve.  I was fucking willing.  Nothing happened.

The Crossing Church - Playing on Fear and Greed for Cash

Anything new happening at The Crossing Church?  Same regurgitated bullshit?  Yep, pretty much. 

Play on what people want to hear, expose their fears and promise them everything will work out.  It's what we all want: a guarantee.  We want to be assured that we won't get sick and die too soon.  We want to believe our families and loved ones will always be safe and secure.  We want a safety net from all the worries about money.  

Everyone is scared whether they admit it or not.  Of course due to past experience, some are much more frightened than others.  But no one has the "peace that passes all understanding".  This is why people pray like maniacs, fast, tithe and submit themselves to controlling church leadership.  If I do ___ then I'll get ____.  As long as I pray the prayer of ___ then nothing bad will happen.  

Bad happens.  Bad happens all the time.  Bad happens all the time to good people.  What then?  Oh that means that you're being tested, or strengthened, or God thinks you can handle it. (cough cough)  

A few doozies from Pastor Eric Dykstra's "Big Ask Series":

25:27 – when you open the door to him he ALWAYS comes through

30:40 – as you begin to pray, he will begin to respond

31:30 – God will speak as clearly as a text message if you will talk to him

32:20 – you guys have Caribou coffee in the lobby, however in MY OFFICE we serve Starbucks, because I LIKE Starbucks  (...said the raging narcissist) 

36:14 – if you go out and pray in the moment you will have supernatural peace

36:46 – you've never prayed a prayer where nothing has happened...when you pray something always changes...every time.  (Nope.)

So when you're praying for your uncle to stop molesting you and he doesn't, then God changes your heart.  When you pray for a healthy baby and you have a stillborn, God changes your heart.  When you pray for financial help and you become homeless, God changes your heart.  Gee....see any possible error in this idea?  See how this might really hurt people who have been fucked by life?

I'm begging you Crossing, and all prosperity churches, stop using the people of your congregation for your gain.  Stop using people's fear to fund your vacations and new homes.  You are hurting people and one day you will pay dearly.  I ask you, I plead with you, to stop.  You aren't doing God's work; this is only for your ego and pocketbook.