You are not being persecuted for Jesus, Crossing Church

Just watched the last of The Crossing Church's sermon series "Taste & See".  Though the sermon was preached to the church, it was really just a pep rally to get the congregation to bring more people to church.  (Church growth = $$$)  The Crossing has done everything from outright public shaming to make their people bring more to their church (ex. - putting invite cards on every chair and making everyone stand "before God" to commit to giving them out) to the more subtle ways, such as this sermon.  

Pastor Eric Dykstra went through various ways that people react to hearing the Gospel.  The first he calls Rejection - "the enemy steals some peoples' understanding".  "It's not that they don't understand - The Evil One STOLE their ability to understand."  - referencing 2 Corinthians 4:4.  So if I don't believe like you, with your interpretation, then Satan has confused me?  

He goes on to say that, "You can't convince anyone to believe.  It's the Holy Spirit's job."  "they don't have deep roots - they fall away as soon as they have problems" "we stay in faith and grow past our problems"  "they tithed once" "you stay in faith until you see it"  So if someone's faith dies, then why didn't the Holy Spirit kick in and help?  Provide comfort?  This doesn't make any sense at all.  So what happened to me?  Because I did believe.  I did.  I was baptized twice.  I gave, gave and gave some more. I was "in the faith" for decades.  

The real fun comes at minute 26.  "Persecution usually looks like false accusation, slander, mockery or lying...."  Oh hell, you aren't being persecuted for Jesus.  I am mocking you because of the dumb ass things you say that hurt people.  Big difference.  Oh and your reference to the End Times was hysterical.  

Yes, I did get "the life sucker punched out of them"...by you Crossing Church. 

So he says at the beginning that the Holy Spirit is in charge of bringing people to Jesus.  Not you.  You're off the hook.  Yeah!  Then the best scripture twisting moment is at minute 42.  "those who believe produce fruit - do you have any?" "your life is going to lead someone to Jesus...you've gotta keep saying the Gospel until someone comes to FAITH!!!!"  At minute 46:20 he says that  "you're gonna be the one to do it".  Minute 44 "you get to do this church!!"  Um, no.  Producing fruit has to do with the fruits of the spirit: love, joy, peace, kindness, etc...  People coming to Jesus is not a test of your faith and it's so sad to think how many in that Crossing Church audience felt the shame of that ridiculous statement.

It's the same old song and dance.  The Crossing Church is once again putting the weight of the world on the shoulders of those who attend.  As I've said before, Big Give expectation will be soon.

Spiritual Misfit - A book review

Though following the antics of The Crossing Church does take up valuable time, not to mention annoyance, I was recently shown the website Blogging for Books and have begun doing book reviews for them.  The first book I chose was Spiritual Misfit by Michelle DeRusha.  I had high hopes for this book after reading the back cover: "After twenty years of unbelief, estranged from her childhood faith and ultimately from God, Michelle DeRusha unexpectedly found herself wrestling hard with questions of spirituality— and deeply frustrated by the lack of clear answers. Until she realized that the questions themselves paved a way for faith.“Declaring my unbelief,” writes DeRusha, “was the first step; declaring my unbelief allowed me to begin to seek authentically.” Spiritual Misfit chronicles one woman’s journey toward an understanding that belief and doubt can coexist."

Though this book starts out with the author exploring her doubt it quickly becomes a checklist on how to be a good church-going Christian.  She was raised Catholic, married a Minnesota Lutheran but really had no firm spiritual base of any kind.  She begins going to a Lutheran church after moving to Nebraska; more out of feeling she should, trying desperately to fit in and to relieve the loneliness of being in a new place without the security of friends and family.  

She has some real moments where she admits her true feelings: "To fake my belief was better than facing the terrifying truth of no life after death."  Yet even in her doubt, it's clear she feels she should believe something.  She is searching for truth but it results in following the set formula.  She flips flops back and forth between acceptance that she'll never fully know the mysteries of the universe to speaking fluent Christianese using every cliche ever written.  I wanted to experience her frustration and doubt yet each time she'd get close to being honest and real, she would come back with a pat answer straight from Sunday school.  

This book clearly had a Christian Evangelical audience in mind and isn't truly written for someone living in the tension between belief and unknowing.  

Where Does My Tithe Money Go? (Kelly takes a vacation)

When you give to a church it's usually understood that the money goes to support the church's finances and keep it running.  Being a pastor's daughter I was well aware that the lights weren't free and the offering paid Daddy's salary.  

At The Crossing church it's a little different: you are giving to God!  You are told repeatedly that God needs 10% (minimum) back and if you give this you'll be blessed!  You can visibly see that a multi-million dollar building is being built but the premise is this: bigger church - more people can fit - so more people get saved by Jesus.  They say they are now being transparent with finances and I'll admit I haven't seen this yet.  

I did see this: These were all the dates Kelly traveled this year.  WOW!

1/25-1/28 - Alabama (funeral / family)
2/2 - St. Louis
2/12-2/16 - C3 - Dallas (conference)
3/18 - Haiti
3/19 - Miami (flying back from Haiti)
4/1 - IA (Easter with family)
5/16 - Seattle (conference)
5/28 - 6/13 - Extended Vacation
9/9 - Houston (Joel Osteen)
10/1 - Staff Retreat
10/17 - Brainerd
11/11-11/17 - Nashville (conference)
11/28 - IA (Thanksgiving with family)
12/2 - 12/6 - Liberty Church / PA, Ohio, Niagara Falls (9 state road trip)
12/25 - Off on another plane (assuming for Christmas with family)

Whether for a conference or family vacation that's a lot of money spent traveling.  Tithe money.  The Dykstra's are of course free to allocate their salaries in any way they choose.  But I have to ask; how much was paid for by the church?  

While pondering this I looked up my Paypay account to see my giving history to The Crossing.  The attached picture is only two months worth of giving.  Looking back I can see how they used manipulation and fear to persuade me, and so many others, to give.  I gave as if I was paying off a mob boss (God).  I never expected blessings - I was just looking for less pain - maybe some protection.  

I sacrificed to give this much.  This was WAY above 10%, this was savings, this was grocery money.  I'm left to wonder how much went to a vacation, shoes or dining out.  I can't lie about this; I'm seething just thinking about it.

Why do you believe what you believe?

This post will finally be true to the title of this blog.  This isn't a post on The Crossing Church, though I may mention them later, but simply a thought from the back alley of my mind.  The past two years have been a troublesome awakening for me as I dissect what I've been taught and tried to determine what I truly believe.

Most of my Christian indoctrination came in childhood.  I wasn't told why we believed these things but simply that I had to believe them.  Believe or burn in hell.  No other option was given.   As I grew I found the contradictions in the bible, and in Christians behavior, rather disheartening.  The cognitive dissonance was overwhelming and I'd check out only to come back to the church again years later.  I'd been taught that the church and Christianity was the only way so while hating every minute I came back in hopes there could be something there for me.  My last church experience was at The Crossing Church, which I gave a brief overview in my first blog post.

Leaving the church, I went deep to explore where Christian beliefs came from and that's when it all fell apart.  I would continually find myself saying "Why the hell did I ever believe this!?"  It amazes me how many Christians I find that don't even understand the basic tenets of their faith.  It also astounds me that they don't seem to care.

I typically find three groups:

The first group is what I'll call your Basic Christian.  They 'accepted Jesus into their heart' as a kid, check the Christian box on surveys, show up for Christmas, Easter and maybe even once a month.  They'll enroll the kids in VBS, do the confirmation thing, throw a Jeremiah 29:11 magnet on the fridge and then pretty much do whatever they want.  Feed the poor?  Well that might take too much out of the vacation fund and those people should get jobs anyway.  Help the orphans?  They are pretty sure the few bucks they throw in the Salvation Army can will suffice.

The second group is a tad more down and dirty with their faith.  They belong to a church, go regularly, are part of a Small Group and volunteer for activities.  Life decisions are made according to the latest book at Lifeway.  They question nothing, and when pressed as to their beliefs they can't explain much.  They gush about Jesus, are very happy to be part of the privileged that get into heaven but aren't exceptionally concerned about reaching people who they feel will be boiled in the lava of hell.  They just don't think about it much.  Jesus died at the cross and now they feel there is nothing they need to do.  Yes, I hear predestination all over this but again, nothing that concerns them.  God is good, life is great and everything is going to turn out fabulous.  Uh huh.

The third group is pretty hard core.  They know their bibles, hermeneutics, eschatology and understand how the bible was put together.  They tend to be on the legalistic side though they'll typically say they aren't.  They believe fully that the bible is the inerrant word of God, lean towards being Republican, feel gay marriage will ruin the country and want to get back to old school bible teaching.

I actually have the most respect for the third group; though I sure don't want to go out for coffee with them.  I respect that they truly know what they believe.  Though I disagree, I get it.  The other two groups make me completely insane.  It annoys me to all hell when people basically take what they like and make up the rest.  It's so self indulgent, and from my view, not at all what Jesus talked about.  Not to mention; if you're going to make shit up then at least make it good!  Why not also throw in Tinkerbell and wishes?  Why not believe God wants you to have extreme wealth?  Why not believe God wants to make all your dreams come true?  Why not believe God will never let harm come to you?  Oh wait...

So my personal dilemma is trying to not let my head explode around people that don't get it.  I feel, strongly, that you should know exactly what you believe, where this belief came from (originally) and why you believe it. I feel you shouldn't follow a person (pastor).  I feel you should back up, with action, what you say you believe.  Not saying works based faith; but put your money where your mouth is.

Shall we do some therapy talk now?  Yes, I think we should.  Just because I feel people should behave a certain way doesn't mean I need to put that expectation on them.  Accept people where they are at - which frankly, is what I expect people to do with me.  Oh dear, this just got messy.

Relationships are messy.  Religion is messy.  The bible is really messy!  Life is messy.